Finals are over. The stress is gone. Break has began. Holidays are here.
First semester of law school is an experience that cannot be put into words. I feel that I walked into Law School blind. Now at the end of December, I feel that I have on glasses. The glasses do not enable me to see clearly, its still blurry but I can see so much better than August 22nd.
My first case briefs were atrocious to say the least. They were entirely too long and did not even contain any of the relevant facts, rules, issues or analysis. By October, I had taken my first midterm and cases were read within a matter of minutes instead of a few hours.
Finals came, they went, am I scarred now? For sure. I feel as if finals period was an out of body experience. I never felt as if I studied enough but the final dates were definite not flexible. I could ask for more time. I showed up and gave it my all or what I understood to be my all.
Now, all that I can do is wait. Once the last final took place, I felt liberated...for five minutes. Now I feel anxious and nervous. Fearing the inevitable. Will I flunk out, did i perform so much lower than expected? I don't now. Grades take time. Soooo much time.
The waiting period is much more dreadful then finals period. I am supposed to be enjoying my break. I am partly but I am worrying about how did I perform, purchasing books and how to approach next semester to improve my abilities.
I am whole, I have grown, and I am confident in my abilities now. Not enough advice could have prepared me for this experience but I would not go back. I value all that I have learned, the new friends I have made and the accomplishments I have attained.
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